Monday, September 15, 2014

The 3rd Elf's in a Pickle

The Third Elf (that's me) is in a bit of a pickle and needs some help (don't we all?) I'll keep this short as I can, because there's so much more interesting stuff to read elsewhere.

For those who don't know me (which is 99.9% of people who reads Visible's blogs) I've been his web master elf for around 4 years; for those with longish memories I came on board with Visible as the (non) entity known as "Sim" (that was when Smoking Mirrors was, in a sense, a darker place) - and for reasons I can barely now recall, I changed name at some point to what it is now, Visible's 3rd Elf.

Anyway, I've not only f*cked up, but in recent days I've been f*cked over too - the most pressing consequence of which is I have a little over 48 hours in which to find a place to live. This is something which is as non-negotiable as it is pressing.

Back to where I was, which is nowhere much; 48 hours is all I've got to try get myself installed somewhere - and if this is going to happen, it's going to cost me money that I do not have. (Right now, an ice-cream would cost me money I don't have; one indicator of how badly the f*ck up has been).

I am NOT asking for a donation (or donations, whichever - alright, the buttons in this post might say "donate" but I haven't got time now to customise things much); what I am asking is if any person(s) reading might consider making a loan or loans to me - via those "donate" buttons) so that I can weather this storm. How big a loan? Hard to say exactly, but securing even the most modest of somewheres is likely to be north of £500 (£750?, damned if I know) once any deposit is factored in. My hope is that maybe a few £5.00 and $10.00 combined will see me make that. Sorry not to be more certain on that particular need, but as I write, I've had little time to research this.

Thank you, if you can help: this first button should work fine for any currency...

... and this next button will be better still if you have the option to pay GBP sterling:


- clicking through via that last image link will mean zero fees if Sterling is paid (because my own bank is in the UK) - plus PayPal will not take the usual 4.9% commission.

The email address to use is - and anyone who can help, please will you also email me so we can talk about me repaying you?

Meanwhile, even if I'm fortunate enough to get a place, I am going to be without a cellphone or a laptop - so if anyone, anywhere, has some old (possibly forgotten, never used, but functioning) hardware tucked away in a drawer which they could spare, it would help massively if they could send it to me...

vintage laptop and cellphone

Please contact me and I'll provide the address (assuming there is one). Or if you want to write and just tell me I'm a dick, or anything else, that's fine, too.

This has been enormously difficult to write; most likely it's too long (while at the same time not saying enough); or it's too short, while saying too much. Whichever way, thanks for reading and thank you again if you are able to help this stricken elf at this particularly challenging and uncertain time.

I've had the privilege of working for Visible for 4 years. It's an unpaid role - when I first started working for Vis he had no money to speak of (and I suspect the same pretty much applies today). Let me clarify something there; it's an unpaid role because those were the terms that I set and I wouldn't have had it (or will have it) any other way. It's unpaid (in the conventional sense) because before I even started working for Visible, he'd already given me something which I couldn't begin to put a price on; I've never worked for Vis "for free"; everything I've done (and still hope to do) has been payback. For me to ask Visible for help now simply doesn't jive; I set out my terms to him in 2010 and I'm not going to breach them. This is why I'm casting the net elsewhere - and that's to anyone here who might be reading this.

Thank you again. I'll update within 48 hours if there's anything to update on, and I'll update after 48 hours if I can.